My Little Big Girl

Its been a week of playdates, trips to the library, parks and restaurants! The kids had a week off and I loved spending every minute with my two darlings. We read a lot, played even more and talked tons. Two of the playdates brought out sides in my daughter that surprised me.

Playdate 1- We had gone to the Jacob Ballas children's garden with S's classmate who is about 6 months younger than her. The kids were having a blast and playing together. Just as were siting at the cafe and relaxing, I suddenly heard S scream out in agony. I turned and my heart nearly skipped a beat. The classmate had thrown (on a whim) a heavy stone at S and it had hit her forehead causing it to bleed and swell rapidly.

After hours of applying an ice pack and a heavy dose of paracetamol, S was slowly getting back to being herself. Just then her grandparents came on Skype and were very bothered to see their baby's forehead in the condition that it was. They asked her what happened and told her to stay away from naughty kids to which my little big girl said "No, he's not a naughty boy, thatha. He's still learning. He didn't really mean to hurt me, ok?"

I was proud, amazed and thrilled to hear that she had so much love and forgiveness in her. At 3, such a mature approach was not what I'd expected. I thought she would say "Amma, I'm never playing with him again for hurting me like this".

I was humbled.

Playdate 2- A girl my daughter's age came home one afternoon. My son, the natural leader that he is was trying to organize a game with his sister and the visiting friend. And naturally, he was extra kind to the guest asking her preference and making her feel very much at home. S, my daughter, usually very friendly and sweet was not in her element. For some reason she turned her back on the guest. And the more she ignored the guest, the more attention she got from my son. And at one point he even gave her a peck on her cheek to cheer her up. That was the final straw! My daughter sulked, threw a little tantrum and refused to play.
I let her be discarding it as 'cranky behaviour' and asked my son to play with the friend.

After the guest had left, I had a chat with S about 'treating guests' etc. Her eyes welled up, her lips wobbled and then it all came out like a torrent. "I dont want anna to like any other girl. Anna loves her more than me, he's MY brother!!"And she cried her heart out. Aaw...my little girl was experiencing jealousy for the first time.
She is her anna's girl alright and will walk to the end of the world for him. Her tender heart couldn't bear to watch her brother being as nice to a peer as he usually was with her. He was all hers...atleast for the next few years!

I was touched.

Hey, how can you so easily forgive a child who caused you so much physical pain and not forgive a friend who did nothing at all except maybe be friendly with your brother? You are suddenly this girl displaying wisdom way beyond her age and the next minute you are this lisping preschooler who's being totally unreasonable.

Mature, childish, forgiving, jealous, big girl,baby!

My son, gourmet!

My son must have been an Italian his previous birth. Till the time he was 3, all he would eat was Mac & Cheese, garlic bread or Pasta Pomodoro! It was pure torture the first time we took him to India. All the paatis and mamis conveniently blamed me for not getting him used to 'paruppu sadam'. Unfazed, I replied "Why dont you get him to try it now...not too late". And they did with full gusto. Paruppu with a hint of rasam- came out as a projectile. Paruppu with just ghee and crushed appalam- came out after some serious choking. Paruppu sans anything- was spat out in disgust! I didn't know if I should empathize or just gloat!

God knew that I tried every possible food with V. Healthy kootus, flavourful dhals, aromatic rasams...and the result was always the same. My neighbour once said that she was surprised that I took so much effort to prepare a baby/child's food. Apparently, she just blended up some veggies with rice, added some salt and gave it to her kid. And the irony of it was that the kid practically licked the bowl clean!And here I was making small quantities of appetizing food, subtly flavoured (I liked to use most spices except chilly) to entice my little prince's tastebuds!

There were days when he would eat a slice of cheese , a small bowl of pasta and a cup of yogurt. And that was for the entire day not a single meal! I tried everything with him, even the big No Nos to get him to eat more. But V was too busy exploring and discovering his immediate world and food to him, was absolutely the last priority. I fretted, I cried and sometimes even starved (not intentionally, but just couldn't eat when my little one was not! weird, huh!). And then I just let him be.

Today the scene is quite different. V is a non-fussy eater who LOVES his vegetables (even the yucky ones) and enjoys new foods. Not just that, he can tell me what's in a certain dish and what's not. eg."Amma, this dish tasted better the last time when you had added some garlic". He loves hanging out in the kitchen with me and once even borrowed a Mom and Kids recipe book from the library!Wow...I sometimes wonder if this is the same boy! And I'm so glad that I did not listen to my neighbour and bore him with bland, insipid baby food.


Yesterday, on our way back from school he asked me what his snack was going to be. And I told him that he could have anything he wanted. Pat came the repy"Amma, can I have some hot appams pl"? I was thrilled that he remembered the taste of traditional appams and actually craved it! And the feeling was inexplicable! I made the appams and watched him eat them with great satisfaction. Aah....how easy it is to express love through food!

V has started his food journey maybe a few years later than other kids, but he sure has started it on the right foot. And I'm just hoping that as he discovers new tastes and samples food from the world over he also fondly remembers all the good old home cooked foods that nurtured him!